Love, according to a hit song from the 70s, can keep you and your beloved together.
For sure, there is no reason not to believe that since such an inexplicable feeling can do wonders for any relationship. It can heal wounds along with time; it can soften even a stone-hearted person’s heart. However, “Couples often feel that they know and understand their partner, and are compatible on most issues. However, this is a mistake.” Dr. Chantal Gagnon PhD LMHC also added.
Regardless of that, love is admittedly not enough basis for a couple to stay married to each other. To prove that point, here are some predictors of divorce.
- You Tied The Knot Too Young Or Quite Late
Marrying someone in your teens is not the most practical decision. Apart from not having the financial means to look after the family that you will create, you may still be subconsciously not ready for the life ahead of you. It can get worse once you work and start meeting other people.
Likewise, getting hitched past the age of 32 increases your risk of becoming a divorcee later. The idea is that if you waited that long, your primary reason for marrying is to have a child or a lifetime companion perhaps. Thus, you might enter the matrimony without thinking much whether that individual is the one for you or not. “Divorce is not something that should never be entered into lightly. It means an end to that relationship and the breakup of a family, which can be greatly traumatizing to the children of that marriage.” Jennifer Baxt, LMFT, LMHC explained.
- Your Roles Got Switched
Women fought against gender discrimination for years. They want to be able to work alongside men, get paid according to their competencies, and have an opportunity to rise through the ranks as their male counterparts. Despite that, gaining that kind of equality does not entail that husbands should stay at home and let the wives become the sole provider of the family.
Once the roles switch, though, and a woman sees that the man cannot even be helpful around the household, the former’s reverence for the latter may dissipate slowly. After a year or so of experiencing that scenario, one may eventually file for divorce.
- The Criticisms Are Going Overboard
Attacking the love of your life in a verbal manner is another ground for separation. You can exchange silly jokes with your better half from time to time, yet it is an entirely different story if you genuinely believe that there is something wrong with your spouse and do not mind continually informing him or her about it.
On your partner’s end, they may try to appease you or change for you at first. However, in case the jabs at their character come too often, it is likely that they will call it quits soon enough rather than take further criticisms from you.
- Infidelity Took Place
“We all know that both sexes are guilty of infidelity and that blame for a broken relationship is not the fault of a gender, but there are several aspects of male infidelity that are more attributable to men then women.” Katrina Bilhimer, Ma, LMHC said. The marriage already hangs by a thread when you decide to have an extramarital affair. Although you may try to conceal it or claim that the third party came on strong at you, that cannot hide the fact that you cheated on your husband or wife.
Considering your spouse forgives you for doing so, it is not a guarantee that he or she will forget your infidelity. The better half may find your actions suspicious quite often, to the point that they want to know the passwords to your accounts, your daily agenda, and what-not. It is only a matter of time before you or your significant other gives up on that situation.
Marriage cannot survive with love alone. Plenty of challenges will test you as a couple. If one of you does not participate or is too weak to do so, your relationship will indeed end in divorce.